The Struggle is Real

Well today is gonna just be a vulnerable post to share that even in the midst of following God's plan the struggle is real and it's hard!!

We have no doubt that God moved us to Arkansas. We feel confident that we are right where we are supposed to be! But just because we are doing what God asked us to do does not mean it's easy!

Being away from our friends and our church has been hard. Going from constantly having things to do and people to hang out with to almost none feels lonely. Trying new churches has been weird, because we didn't leave our church....I mean we did and we didn't! We moved away which meant we couldn't go to our church anymore but we didn't just choose to leave our church. We still very much love More Church and it will always be our church home away from home. That makes finding a new church challenging. It's like being in a relationship and that relationship ending when you didn't want it to end and now you have to go date new people even though you miss the relationship that you didn't want to end! There are aspects of trying new churches that is exciting, because it's new. But it feels so different, with different faces and different surroundings. We have tried a couple great churches and are praying for God to tell us which one is the right one.

The money struggle is real too! Moving is expensive! We are so thankful though for all the many family and friends that made that part sting a whole lot less than it would have otherwise. But the reality is setting in that I don't yet have a job and Terry has a job that is hourly pay and weather dependent, so if the weather is bad and he doesn't have work in the office to do then he has to come home without pay. We already saw the reality of that last Friday and most likely will again this week. This is the part where trusting God has to be our main focus or else we may crumble under the weight. I will say it would be super easy to head on in to freak out mode. Seeing what is left in our savings and what our bills are and what the income is would be enough to send us right into a tailspin of worry. For this girl who is prone to anxiety and freaking out it is going to be a daily decision to lean into God and trust His plan. Because as chaotic and uncertain as things may feel, the one thing we have not wavered in is knowing we are right where God put us. Because of that certainty it makes all the uncertainties just go away......I wish LOL, they don't go away but knowing that we are where God wants us gives us a peace and we just have to cling to that in moments that feel overwhelming.

The verse of the day on YouVersion today was this: "But forget all that--- it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19 NLT This verse was right on time today as I have been feeling the weight of our finances looming overhead. It was a little God nudge, him saying that all we are feeling is nothing compared to what He is going to do.

It's easy to want to know the plan and know it right now. But the truth is, if God showed us the entire plan up front there wouldn't be very many who would be willing to keep following it. I have learned to be okay with not knowing what's around the corner and I'm learning to trust God and lean into him and allow him to lead me because.....spoiler alert.....he knows far more about my life and where it's headed than I do!!

My content here may be a little different going forward because I feel compelled to share our journey here, it's good for me to sort of journal the journey but my hope is that maybe someone else will be encouraged by it or at the very least know that they're not alone. I never want to portray an image of "I have it all together" or "I never struggle" because I definitely do not have it all together and I struggle very frequently! If you can relate to that then you're in the right place!